My first recent memory of realizing that where I was in life wasn’t where I wanted to be happened to be in my beat up black Dodge that I bought for around $2,000 after I graduated high school and moved down to San Diego.
I was in community college and working at this cute Italian restaurant in Little Italy called Mona Lisa’s. Shout out to Mona Lisa’s for the delicious meals I would eat on the daily - I’ve never met a pasta I didn’t like (for real, though).
Anyways, I was sitting in my car before work on the phone with my mom. A/C broken, car sweltering, sweat dripping and caking up my drugstore makeup - quite a sight, if I do say so myself.
I remember telling her how I felt like I was in the rinse and repeat cycle. I felt stuck in monotony, bored and directionless. I felt like I wasn’t living up to my full potential - and I was right.
Now, I’m not going to say it was this a-ha moment from there. It would be years later that I would take the leap to work for myself and launch this blog.
It wasn’t the a-ha moment, but it was the spark.
Many of us have experienced the spark before.
The lightbulb moment.
The intuition whispering: Wake up my love, it’s time for more.
You may be reading this and realize that you’ve had many of these moments. If so, you’re definitely not alone.
What’s important to know about the spark is that it doesn’t mean everything has to move from 0 to 60 from that point forward. Instead, it’s the start of a progression where you get to choose the speed.
Now, years later when the spark happens, I get to hit the gas pedal and go as fast as I can. It’s taken practice, it’s taken work, and it’s taken the slow unraveling and self inquiry of getting to know myself to find this speed.
I wanted to write this blog to help you along your first steps of personal transformation. This is for those of you experiencing the spark. Those of you that feel like you are meant for more than where you are at now. It’s not going to be easy - there’s a reason “ignorance is bliss” is a phrase we hear often.
But the good news? If you feel like you’re meant for more, it’s because you are.
Okay, so you feel the spark, now what? Start to get curious about what’s working and what isn’t working. Do you feel stuck in the monotonous rinse and repeat cycle of your schedule? Maybe you’re craving more flexibility. What is it that your soul is craving?
If you don’t know, start by creating a vision board. The beauty of vision boards is that it extracts dreams and desires from your subconscious through imagery. You may not have even known that it was there, but then you started flipping through the pages of a magazine and felt pulled to an image of a car driving down the coast. You don’t know why, but you pull it out and feel deeply connected to it. A-ha, adventure is something missing from your life.
Don’t question whether your curiosity is realistic or not, instead lean into it. When you realize what it is that you want, follow the next step:
The moment you feel a pull to do something - DO IT. Take one small step a week until you feel comfortable and consistent with this action. Then, turn it into two steps a week.
I can’t tell you what these exact steps are, but I can tell you that your intuition knows.
Take time to get quiet and journal, meditate, or dream. Through our separation from distraction and noise, we allow space for our intuition to flow through us. Again, lean into the guidance you receive.
I’m reading this book called, Drive, that speaks all about what motivates us to succeed and live fulfilled lives. Surprisingly, while extrinsic motivation like a bonus at work or promotion actually doesn’t produce the best results. Instead, it’s our connection to our work and the lack of pressure that causes great work.
If you want to start a new project, don’t put pressure on yourself to make money right away or receive outside reinforcement. Create to create because it feels good. The more you are in alignment with what feels good, the more easily the rest will follow.
For about 3 years into my personal transformation journey (yes, three years), I would find myself beating myself up for the times when I would feel like I was “regressing.” It would be the times when I’d let fear in too much or would have a massive emotional reaction to an external force (you know, like my partner being a complete dick…okay, still working on it).
Rather than beating yourself up for “taking a step backward” remember that you aren’t actually taking a step backward. You’re integrating what you’ve learned in a new way. Be gentle with yourself in these times because this is when you need compassion the most.
Tell yourself you love you, treat yourself to a sweet treat (or 3) and remind yourself that self growth is not linear, there will be times when you’re peeling back the onion in a way you haven’t experienced before.
That's why I'm SO excited for my upcoming retreat in Costa Rica this November.
The Conscious Creator's Retreat at Bodhi Tree Yoga Resort is going to be a life-changing trip that will rock your world. Joined by Kate Van Horn, we will be teaching you all the tools we use to create massive changes in our lives, relationships and careers.
- How to manifest anything you desire in your career and relationships
- How to find and create your own community of likeminded and passionate humans
- The steps to Unbreakable Confidence in every area of your life
- How your story is actually your superpower and the ways to break through limiting beliefs
- How to create multiple streams of income so you can work + create from anywhere in the world
The retreat is 5 nights and 6 days in the Costa Rican sun. We'll be surfing, practicing my signature class, Tone to Transform, the In.Body.Me method by Kate Van Horn, plus SO MUCH MORE.
It's not your average yoga retreat - it's an opportunity to show up for yourself so the universe and world can show up for you.
If you're interested in coming, the deposit is only $500 to save your spot. We've got a range of rooms including triple, double and single occupancy, and you can use the code "CONSCIOUS" for $100 off your retreat.
For full details, schedule, payment plans, photos and more, click the button below. You know I'd love to have you, so let's make it happen!
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